Thought I was making a joke first thing this morning. Instead I got bitched at for it. Then spent 10 min in the bathroom crying about it. Great way to start the day.....

Up and down and up and down. That's all life, or at least mine, really is. I graduated, I got out of a bad relationship, my job is going well enough for me to want to stay. I'm feeling confident, secure, looking good. Of course when I meet someone who I am astoundingly attracted to, and after making plans, I am warned that he is 'damaged goods' and that he may not even be ready for a relationship. Greeeeeaaaat. All my hopes have been given up again. Now, of course, I'm feeling unworthy, useless. I've been denied without even being given a chance, I feel. Hurt after being hurt so quickly. It's too much. I get led on, and then dropped so fast that I'm getting emotional whiplash. Why, in the world, do I always attempt to 'help' the needy, the damaged, the broken. It's never worked! And people like that, they can only help themselves. I know that, I KNOW that. So why do I persist? What is it in me that is drawn to that, even though I know I only ever get hurt. I'm bawling right now.